Snail

I'm plagued with Snails, not normal snails but fuck-off  huge snails and they are eating my new 'erb garden.
At first sight I was charitable and gently lifted them out of the container and placed them in another part of the garden where they could munch on the weeds and other vegetation till their hearts content.

No..... That's not good enough for these greedy bastards, they much prefer the Hilarys sweet lemon mint, French golden Oregano and other tasty occupants of my bed of gastronomic delights. They appear also to be quite partial to my Sufina (miracle plant of the 90's) too.

Be warned  you slugs with a mortgage. I am on your case. Through neccessity I have taken to getting up in the middle of the night. Armed with a torch I track them down. I'm beyond gently repositioning them. They are now flicked from my garden trowel onto the hard car park  with a great deal of force.... They can then cook in the summer sun (if it ever comes back)  or make make tasty morsels for numerous birds in the neighourhood.  

Get a penchant for dot leaves and nettles you slimy grubs or you are history............

An ironic footnote -They also like Garlic......